Family all home safe

Hello Blog,

An early start today with family going home and appointments at the doctor and hospital.

The alarm clock woke me at 06:45 and I pottered downstairs to put the kettle and the koffie machine on to get the family up and running.

The bacon came out of th ridge and the eggs were whipped to make a big omelate. So we had lovely bacon and egg buns to start the day.

My first trip was to the doctor to collect medicine with John and a pee pot to make a test on my urine as it feels strange and flows too well.......

On the way back we got stuck at the canal bridge for 15 minutes so we started to panic as we had to quickly nip home to say goodbye to my family and rush off to the next hospital appointmnet.

At 09:00 we got home with quick cuddles and kisses to say goodbye to family and sped off to the local hospital to meet up with my Oncologist.

We arrived 3 minutes late...so not too bad really....and within a few mins we were invited in.

I had met this Oncologist Dhr van Reizen 2 years ago when I had my chemo after the RC Radical Cystectomy. He is such a gentle man and very calming and wanted to hear what we expected from him.

Obviously firstly we wanted to know if he agreed with all the advise we had received thus far and he agreed. Very compassionate and had had experience with only one other patient with the same diagnosis in the last ten years. No effective treatment is available for this ravage of bladder cancer cells in the spinal fluid. Of course for other cancers types.....not for bladder cancer cells.

Yes it was downhearting and sad and I dropped into a dip.....I have done enough now.....questions have been asked and answered. Time to get the acceptance....if it ever comes.....I hope so....soon...I need more peace and less anxiety in my body as it is up and down and I get the shakes with worry.

I think my doctor will increase my calming meds next week.....I do it anyway myself when I feel the need.

My neo bladder is having a whale of a time being incontinent during the daytime at the moment....normally I have total control in the day....the moment I relax it just lets go and I have to chane pads regular to stay dry.

I am hoping it has something to do with an infection in my bladder which will be confirmed Mon/Tue next week and an antibiotica cure will sort that out.

After today's adventures I slept well this afternoon with a few cat naps and now have the energy to write a bit of the blog.

X-Factor in Holland the first live shows are just about to start so Leigh signing out.......

xxx Leigh